SLE domain

Your mom is a ho.

Type domains
Alpha Quadra:	ILE	SEI	ESE	LII
Beta Quadra:	EIE	LSI	SLE	IEI
Gamma Quadra:	SEE	ILI	LIE	ESI
Delta Quadra:	LSE	EII	IEE	SLI

Find Your Type

Having trouble typing yourself? Here are some guidelines for you to work within:

Can't find your dominant function? Well then, take a look at these simple and accurate functional descriptions. Even though they're only a couple of sentences long, you should have no problem at all seeing yourself in them!

Ne: You crash into walls a lot, and cause lots of car accidents. You also stop right in the middle of doorways, hallways, subway entrances, and stairwells in order to socialize, thus blocking everyone else.

Se: You love to beat people up, and you also play football. You are obsessed with power, and constantly threaten to pop a cap in someone's ass. You rape lots of people, and commit felonies every day.

Si: You are really fat, and you lie around and watch TV all day. You have superior fashion sense, and love to fix cars too. You also love to force feed porridge to everyone that enters your house.

Ni: You were born to take it up the ass. You constantly lie on the ground with your legs splayed, waiting for your next rapist to come along. You are also a mall psychic who will read tarot cards for $5.

Fe: YOU TALK LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME, HAAHAHAHAHAHHHHAH LOLOLOL!!!!111 :D YOU USE LOTS OF ACRONYMS SUCH AS LOL, ROFL, LMAO, TTYL, TEH LULZ, AND MOOOOOOOORE! YOU ARE LOUD AND LIKE TO GO SHOPPING.

Te: You are always dressed in a business suit, and spend your days in a cubicle, or at an endless stream of office meetings. You love to do taxes, laundry, and dishes, because that's what responsible people with character do.

Ti: You make up gazillions of useless systems and rules. Also, you are totally stupid, as you're always factually inaccurate in everything you do. You're the reason why the world sucks so much.

Fi: You're a moralistic prude, and love to beat people with Bibles. You live in a red state, and probably voted for George Bush because of his "family values." You are also really clingy, and hate friendly people.

Quadra Descriptions

Next, it's time for Quadra descriptions. These apply to everyone within the quadra, with zero exceptions. Alpha: You are in a constant good mood, and always have a fun atmosphere with lots of food and drink. You throw lots of dinner parties where everyone sits at the table with a glass of red wine.

Beta: You make the revolutions, baby! You are a neo-nazi Hitler fanatic, and are always trying to rile people up in order to overthrow the government. You are also very loud and obnoxious, and always making vulgar jokes.

Gamma: You are a moralistic, capitalistic pig, and you are all about bringing home the dinero. You hate fun, groups, and any sort of affection at all. You are very mean and closed-minded.

Delta: You are so boring that everyone else killed themselves. You sit in your workshop, carving wood all day. Then, you get home, work for a few more hours, and go to sleep. Repeat this process daily.

With this, you should have your type picked out by now. All your problems will be solved once you know your Socionics type, because then you can spot your dual!!! Your dual is like having God constantly at your side, and they will make your life complete. Duality is magical: you will never have to do anything again. Ever!

Conversations Between Duals

ILE/SEI:

ILE: I'm a spazzy social cripple who constantly spews out all this awkward bullshit. I also need someone to feed me. Help!

SEI: Hahahahaha, hi there!!1 I'll give you some of my breastmilk and tell you everything you should say around people, as long as you tell me that I'm smart all the time (even if I'm a dumbfuck)! Sounds good>>!>!>!?!!?! :D

ILE: It's a deal! Now dress me in a diaper and I'll get you a chilled beverage. We can have sex with both objects.

LII/ESE:

LII: I'm a really ugly nerd, and I am completely oblivious to my surroundings. Also, I cry whenever someone tells me that I need to move because I'm blocking their way. What can I do about this particular issue?

ESE: YOU JUST NEED ME TO TALK TALK TALK TO EVERYONE THAT GETS IN YOUR WAY!!!!!!!!!!! I'LL BORE THEM TO DEATH (LITERALLY) AND THEN YOU'LL BE FREEEEEEEEEEEEE! BUT ONE THING CAN YOU PLEASE HELP ME NOT FREAK OUT AT EVERY LITTLE THING THAT DOESN'T GO TO PLAN?!?!?!?!?!

LII: Sure, I will help you organize your day so you don't accidentally kill off good people with your boring talk. Cool.

SLE/IEI:

IEI: I am sitting on this couch, slitting my wrists. I need someone to punish me like the naughty teenager I am. Spank me! I've been bad!

SLE: Yo muthafucka, SLE's IN DA HOOD YO! Bend ova, bitch, cuz I'm gonna snap a whip on yo ass if you don't BE-HAVE. Oh, and while we're at dis, can you help me restore my rep after I kick everyone's azz? Ho, I need ya to tell me I'm awesome.

IEI: *slap* Ahhh, harder! *smack* I'll help you after you're done raping me! Don't stop!

LSI/EIE:

LSI: I get my panties in a bunch if someone breaks a rule. I'm also two-faced, ultra-serious and I have bad character. What can I do to help fix this? I have no Ne, so I can't think of anything.

EIE: HEY HEY HOOOOOOOO! I CAN JUST BE CHEEERY AND OBNOXIOUS AROUND YOU, AND YOU'LL BE SOO HAPPY AND EVERYTHING WILL BE GOOD! :o CAN YOU HELP ME NOT BE STUPID THOUGH? I'M A FEELER, SO I CAN'T THINK. LSI: Haha, thanks! I'll be your walking checkbook, so you don't have to do any thinking at all.

SEE/ILI:

ILI: Ugh. The world sucks. I hate everyone because they suck. Everyone hates me back. Life sucks. You suck.

SEE: Hey there, life's not so bad when you're getting laid 8 times a day! Here, how about I help you with that whole virginity thing that you've been angry about for the past 24 years? I'll sleep with anyone, so it's all good!

ILI: Thank you. I have always wanted to see a set of genitals besides my own, but to no avail. I'll predict what STD everyone has so that you don't get it and pass it to me.

ESI/LIE:

LIE: Money. Facts. Capitalism. Financial security. Office meetings. Efficiency. More boring corporate shit. Help, I can't relate to people, because no one gives a shit about any of the neat things I listed above.

ESI: I may be a stone cold bitch on the outside, but I really care about you deep down in the bottom of my icy heart. As long as you continue to get $500k a year, that's all I care about. I will love you unconditionally and never let go.

LIE: Thanks, I was getting worried there for a second that I'd be alone for the rest of my life. Now I know that someone cares about me, even if they really only care about my paycheck. Nice!

IEE/SLI:

SLI: I hate life, and I'm considering bringing a weapon to school so I can cause the next Columbine. I will then shoot myself in the head because I'd go to jail for life otherwise.

IEE: Hey look! A butterfly! It's so preeettty! Oh wait, what was that again? I didn't hear you the first tiiiiime!

SLI: Heh, you're really funny. I'm not so angry any more. Just for helping me, how about I fix your car for free?

EII/LSE:

LSE: Although I am such a manly caretaker, I can't make brownies by myself. Hey, oh feminine EII, can you make me some brownies? Because that's all you're good for: being girly and making brownies.

EII: Yes, I will make you brownies. Since you are my masculine provider, I feel the need to service you like a good wife should. I'll also help you get over your fear of being less than an hour early to your next office meeting.

LSE: Why thank you, ma'am. I'll be sure to bring you some empty cash so you can get to the kitchen and make me more brownies.

SLE Functional Breakdown

Se SLEs are the reason you exist. Without them, society would either be in chaos, or weak. HEIL SLE!

Ti SLEs use the penultimate function to beast you with their flawless logic. They know everything they need to know and will probably use it against you if need be.

Ne Those who can't do, think. About possibilities which will never happen. Yeah, steer away from that if you want to be a legend.

Fi Who cares about your feelings?

Ni SLEs know that the best functions in life don't come for free (well, two of them at least). They are pretty good in Ni, but from time to time they could do with someone who is good at what they're not always that brilliant at. IEI WE LOVE YOU! IEI WE LOVE YOU!

Fe SLEs know what a good party is. They know that they can't always be legends and do everything by themselves, so they employ a bit of coolness to come and provide atmosphere for what they've organized.

Si SLEs aren't lazy bastards; they know how to actually achieve a goal. Instead of lying on a beach or a sofa watching TV, they are getting shit done.

Te SLEs don't spend all their time accumulating useless information about how to save 10% off four chicken wings at Papa Joe's, nor do they waste their time talking about how to be "efficient" or "productive"; they just are these things.

Type domains
Alpha Quadra:	ILE	SEI	ESE	LII
Beta Quadra:	EIE	LSI	SLE	IEI
Gamma Quadra:	SEE	ILI	LIE	ESI
Delta Quadra:	LSE	EII	IEE	SLI